Saturday, February 27, 2010

I'm impressed

Well I went to Tuscon with some friends today on a tour of the University of Arizona... I have to say I was pretty impressed. Now I am going to go up to Utah and try school there but if I have to transfer back to Arizona for tax reasons as I am still a dependent of my parents I will probably transfer to the University of Arizona. I need to focus on getting my CNA (certified nursing assistant) license this summer though so I can get a decent job in most places and Tuscon would definitely have jobs in that field.

Friday, February 26, 2010

Why I hated High School

I had a hellhole of a High School Career. When the counsellors say you will look back on High School fondly my response is you have no clue what I went through in High School. That being said I'm considering becoming a High School History Teacher.

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Tuscon here we come!

This Saturday I'm going to be going to Tuscon to tour the University of Arizona with some friends. Although I am not particularly interested in going to a University in Arizona I'm going to get out of town for the day so of course I'm going!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Crawling

After taking a few days to think about an email my Dad sent me asking me some hard and fast questions about where exactly am I going in life I've found that what's going on can be described by Linkin Park's song "Crawling." My life is getting pulled in so many directions right now. I responded to my Dads email and now I am glad I took some time to think about what I needed to say as he recommended. It definitely helped. However now I still feel like my life is still being pulled in several directions. On one side my Dad wants me to follow the religion he raised me in, a religion in which I was stabbed in the back multiple times and I was lied to straight to my face. While I didn't let him know that I had left that religion, I did let him know that I saw no point in following a religion where the members of which have stabbed me in the back multiple times. His religion is not for me and I still have scars which need time to heal. How much time I don't know but it is definitely going to be a while to heal from all the bullshit I went through.

I also let him know that I still do not agree with the move from Maryland to Arizona though I do understand some of the reasons such as my little sister who has asthma would get very sick during the winter as the cold weather during the winter would trigger asthma attacks for her and she would end up in the hospital as a result. Then she also had allergies. Apparently out of the 50 most common allergies 48 of the 50 allergens are native to the Maryland/Virginia area. My youngest sister is also allergic to the Mums family including the Chrysanthemum flower. Those grow all over back East.

While this move may have been good for my sisters health, I do not feel it has been good for me. I do not think I fit here its like trying to fit a square in a round hole, I've lived here in Arizona for about 9 years and it is just not working out for me here. I know this sounds selfish and whiny but I do need to take care of myself. However I've been holding this in for so long that I need to start releasing it. I may not be the best or most creative writer in the world but I write to release tension, a lot of which has been building up in my life lately.

Muses of Ancient Greece, I need inspiration. I've been without it for some time now and I could use some please. I need to straighten out the knots in my life and move on. In the Greece you inspired much in literature, writing, art, science, and many others things. Please don't lay dormant any more I need your help. I need your help to find the true me which is buried under the rubble of life. I need more than just a shovel I need a team of bulldozers to clear this rubble away.

On a side note the other day I got an email from the Disney After High School Program that I applied to a while back asking to set up an interview. While I was interested in the program at the time I applied now I do not know if I want to do the after High School program or wait and do the college program. Muses I could really use some major help now!

Meh

To who I was speaking about the lack of comments I'm sorry I was a bit confused about what was going on. Anyways onto other news.

I have discovered a love for a website called zamzar.com its a website that lets you download youtube videos in certain formats. I think when Eurovision starts next month that I am going to be using Zamzar even more.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Summer

I wish summer was here so I could get out of this state. For those of you who don't know I am going to be moving up to Utah for the summer at least, I might stay longer and go to school up there but I don't know. If I can get a job up there than I am staying.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Greek

The thought occurred to me that most colleges and Universities do not offer a Bachelors Program in the Greek Language, let alone any greek language courses. Why is it that while they contributed so much to ideas of democracy, art, literature, science, philosophy, mathematics, and architecture their language is not offered as a course to take in College or University or to even be able to major in Greek Language. I googled US universities which offer a degree program in Greek language and only a handful of Universities showed up and they were all back east. The closest one to the west was at a University in Michigan. This is very puzzling to me when the greeks have contributed so much.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Existence

Lately I feel like I've been speaking to empty space. For example I'll comment on a friends blog but they never comment back on mine they just comment on their blog. So it just feels like all of my blog posts are going into empty space. I think the song Empty Space by Air Traffic is a appropriate description of my feeling of empty space.




I told my parents that I was going to transfer to Chandler Gilbert CC and my Dad tried to talk me out of it. Although I understand that he wants me to be around for my sister who next year will be going to the college (EAC) that I am currently at, I cant take it here. There is nothing here, no nightlife, and I can't get a job here. I need a life and I cant do just school. Thats why I am going to be attending Chandler Gilbert CC this fall. I've been interested in Massage Therapy for some time so I will be doing the Massage therapy program. Chandler Gilbert and Phoenix College are the two community colleges in Maricopa County that offer Massage Therapy. However thats not all I intend to do at Chandler Gilbert. I'm also going for an Associates Degree in General Studies to get all of those annoying prerequisite courses out of the way. I also intend to get an Associates Degree in History. That is just for starters. I'm sure there will be something else I want to major in but thats good for now. However once I finish the massage therapy program I will most likely move out of state to back East and take a a year off to become a resident and then register at a University out East. Preferably University of Maryland-College Park. I'm sure my parents will try to convince me to stay in Arizona (well my Dad would at least my mom would want me to move to Virginia where she's from. My Dads from Phoenix so he's a desert rat) but its time I fended for myself.

Also when I move back to the Gilbert-Mesa area I want to take lessons to learn how to ride a motorcycle. I want to go to a Motorcycle school so I can learn from professional instructors and also not have to go through DMV testing. However to afford this I need a job.

Looking back on myself I've changed a lot. I used to be rather religious (at least in the mormon faith) but I moved on and left their church and now I'm not religious at all. I have no problem with people who choose to belong to a faith or religion and practice it but for now its not for me. I'm not that small boy who got beat up at Benjamin Franklin Charter school and got accused in Junior High by a Kindergartener of beating him up when a jerk in a couple of my classes put him up to it. (Note: Chris White if you ever read this Fuck you, you were and always will be a jackass) I still do not know who I truly am and I feel that I will always be on a path of self discovery. I write to express myself, my feelings, my thoughts and emotions. I write to vent my frustration and anger and how pissed off I can be at certain things such as how jocks at my college can get away with pretty much anything yet I can't. That isnt right.

I cut my ties to my first High School because I was getting nowhere there. My parents wouldnt let me transfer and they wouldnt listen to me about the problems I had there. When my Dad got his job and we moved overseas it was a miracle to get out of that hellhole. Of course though the Principal at my second High School was worst than my first High School combined and with two other teachers that school wasnt just a hellhole, it was a lake filled with gasoline set on fire. When I came back to the states I enrolled in Primavera Online during my first semester of college. I took three classes from them to get my High School Diploma and this was a portion of High School that I actually enjoyed. My teachers actually cared about my opinions and if I had a question though we communicated electronically they were willing to answer my question. I took 7 habits for success, Character Education, and Government. The first two were elective credits because although I had taken classes through Primavera before because of issues with math I needed to take a certain amount of classes from Primavera before I could graduate. I needed government because my second high school did not require it but Primavera and the State of Arizona did. I finished my classes early though it did take them a while to send me my diploma once I got it, seeing my name on it was like a natural rush of happy juice flowed through me. The song "I'm walking on sunshine" immediately started playing in my head. Cheesy I know but I finally had my High School Diploma which took a huge amount of work to get having gone to three different High Schools. I wish my Parents had listened to me. If I had gone to a Mesa High School I could have graduated a year early easily. Or at Primavera I could have graduated a whole year early too. But I graduated a little later than I should have but I earned it and now I have my High School Diploma and I never have to take a High School Class again.

That saying I'm thinking teaching is in my future somewhere down the road either as a History Teacher in a Junior High or High School setting or a college setting or possibly teaching Elementary School. But first after I finish a Bachelors Degree I want to travel and work abroad for a while. There is so much out there that I want to see. I want to see all of Asia, South America, The Middle East, Europe, Africa, and go up to Canada so I can say I've been to all three North American Countries... Canada, the US, and Mexico. If I could teach abroad say ESL in Japan, South Korea, Taiwan, etc., or teaching in International Schools or regular schools in countries I want to go to say The UK for example that would be something I think I would really enjoy.

2 late nights=

Things getting done. Last night I had to write a whole essay analysing Edgar Allan Poes "The Cask of Amontillado" that I had not had time to do/procrastinated on. That was due this morning. Then the night before I had to do something else for classes the next day though what it was I cant remember. And I also got addicted to White Collar so that was on that night so I was watching that till 2 in the morning. I love Adult/College Freedom.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Well

My Dad just emailed me to ask me what my Summer plans are... I realised that I don't have any summer plans other than I am not going back to Riyadh (too hot during the summer and I cant work there) so I am probably going to stay here and try to find a summer job and take a few classes.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

I miss living back east

The grass, the trees, the flowers and other plants.
A warm lazy summer day with a shower of rain in the afternoon.
Trips to the beach in North Carolina during the summer.
The leaves changing colours during the fall.
Actual woods with big trees and not sticks.
Associating bridges with water.
Puddles after a rain shower.
Water
Snow in the winter.
Plants being alive.
Spring poking up through the snow.
My Moms tulip garden in front of our house.
Squirrels and nuts
Wild blackberries growing on the sides of the roads where we would stop and pick buckets of them and then my Mom would make blackberry jam when we got home. Humidity. Yes I know that seems strange to miss but after living in an oven for half my life.
Public transportation that I could take into D.C.
The flavor of the East Coast.
The closeness of other states
Excellent Higher education

Sorry I was daydreaming about how I missed living in Maryland. In this economy I don't know if I could make that daydream a reality. However I am getting more and more frustrated living in the Southwest so I need to do something soon before I go completely beserk.

College Sports Teams

I think this system is messed up. In fact I know this system is messed up. Why? Because Jocks who play sports but break school rules are rewarded instead of punished.

For example Steroid use is against my schools rules and I am pretty sure it is against the law. Yet most members of the Sports teams at my school use steroids often. Now there are the medical steroids for certain uses such as asthma. For example one of my sisters and brothers have been on a steroid before that keeps their lungs open. They are both asthmatics so this was necessary when they were having asthma attacks. However the Steroids the Sports Teams at my college are using are not for purposes such as Asthma.

Then there's drug use. I walk down the hall and you can smell the smell of Pot being smoked. Then there are the days when you walk up the stairs and there is a very strong smell of Axe Spray Deodorant. You know that someones been smoking a lot up there. At the beginning of the year the football team was talking about the fact that most of them had failed their drug tests and they had been out partying. Why havent they been kicked out for drug use? I am fairly sure the coaches of the teams know about the drug use yet they do nothing about it?

Then theres the academic side. I walk down the halls of the dorm I live in and you hear people bragging on how they cheated on a test or how they stole the answers to a test. Then theres the ones who simply party all the time and dont go to class or do their work. Why havent they been dropped from their classes and kicked out of the dorms? Most teachers policies are that if you miss six or more classes unless you have a valid excuse you get dropped from their class. I have no problem with the people who play sports to get a scholarship so they can go to college and make something out of themselves but the people who come here and simply just party and dont do anything and expect everything handed to them on a silver platter? Thats not right.

Monday, February 8, 2010

Floating

Thinking back on when I entered college this year I realised that I've been floating this year because I'm not sure what I want out of life. I've just been taking general classes not really sure what I want to do. However History has sparked an interest in me this year. Theres that quote "Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it" I think I would enjoy educating people about History. Yes I am a bit of History nerd but so what.

Another thing I am interested in as you may have noticed from my past posts is Massage Therapy. The art of healing people without surgery is something I've been curious about now for a while and now I think I'd like to become a Massage Therapist. I've been looking at Massage Therapy Programs in the Southwest and I've found a couple of Massage Therapy Schools but they are all out of my budget and my goal is to stay debt free. So I looked at Community Colleges in Arizona and Utah for Massage Therapy Programs and so far the only CC I've found is Chandler Gilbert Community College. So I will probably be transferring there next year. Unfortunately Mesa CC which is the school I was planning on going to if I moved back to Maricopa County doesn't offer a Massage Therapy Program according to their website. Now that might change soon but who knows. However Chandler Gilbert's Program requires some prerequisite courses which will take another year to earn so it looks like I'll be at a Community College for at least three years. In that case I plan on getting three Associates Degrees. One in General Studies, another in History, and one in Massage Therapy. However before I move anywhere I need a job so if at all possible I hope to be able to at least get a work study job at Chandler Gilbert.

Today I've been rather tired and I'm not exactly sure why. I'll be going to bed a bit earlier than I did last night as a result of this methinks. I have a couple of assignments due in English tomorrow that I've been procrastinating doing and I'm going to procrastinate some more meaning this weekend I am going to be busy. Bleh. I need to put together an organiser and then put all my assignments in that and get them done early so I dont procrastinate till the very last minute like I've been doing. Now my issue is putting together an organiser. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I keep forgetting how peaceful the library is as compared to my dorm. However my dorm this semester is still paradise compared to the one I was in last semester. However I'm using one of the study rooms in the library right now and its quiet and peaceful. Bliss :) ! I need to come here more often. I could get my assignments done more quickly here as well. But I also like the back pillow I bought at Bed Bath and Beyond over Christmas Break with some of the money my parents gave me for Christmas. I put it on top of my bed and I sit on my bed with my laptop. :)

I'm also realising that I have too much stuff in my dorm room but I literally live there so I'm not sure what to do. Its also a kind of compulsion of mine that whenever I have money I buy movies that I want. I always try to get them for under five dollars though because I am a bit of a cheapskate. Half.com is a wonderful place to find good used dvds for a fraction of the price it would cost to buy brand new in stores. I'm also constantly checking out Wal Marts five dollar movie bin to see what they have. For a while nothings interested me there though. I really need a job but its next to impossible to get one here in this town. Work studies get taken by people on the sports teams as they snag them when they move in a few weeks before school starts for practices. So by the time school starts and everyone else moves in all jobs are taken. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I hate this town and this state but I'm stuck at the moment till I can get a job and save up money to move. My current plan at the moment is to get my three Associates Degrees as I stated above then find a job out of state (preferably back east) somewhere else with flexible residency laws, move there and take a gap year and work for a year to save up money and then enroll at a University in that state.

However if I do get accepted into the Disney After High School Program I am going to be moving out of state soon! Keep your fingers crossed for me to get accepted into this program.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Well I haven't faxed in my paperwork for the Disney Program I want to apply to but I should hopefully do that tomorrow. It turns out that there was one more paper I needed so I'll have to print that out tomorrow and then I'll have everything I need.

Today was rather boring. I only had English 102 today and that was this morning so after that I went to the gym this afternoon and then I had nothing else to do. I wish I could find a part time job but I've had no luck with that and I've gone to the Counselling Office and they are no help. I don't like living in a town where I cant get a job. Theres really nothing here for me so its time for me to move methinks. Where to I don't know yet.

I've also decided that I want to become a Massage Therapist for starters. Now how I am not sure yet. It will probably be the community college route unless I get offered a scholarship to a Massage Therapy School because they are expensive. My current college does not offer a Massage Therapy Program so I'm looking around to see what other schools do.

Monday, February 1, 2010

My schedule

Well since my friend decided to post her schedule on her blog I am going to do the same.
I am taking

English 102
I love the Professor for this class. He is really nice and he has a way of making you understand what he is trying to explain. An awesome Professor.

English 111
This is a lab that goes with English 102. Basically when I'm doing my Essays I can get help from writing tutors with this class.

History 102
I took this because I liked History 101 with the same Professor and it looked and sounded interesting. However I'm a bit nervous about having 4 papers due in two weeks on the same day in this class so we will see how that goes. The Professor posts all the assignments and their due dates on his website so I'm debating spending a weekend and doing all the papers at once and turning them in all at once so I don't have to worry about them.

Film As Literature
This class I signed up for because a friend of mine recommended it to me. Basically we watch all sorts of different movies and we discuss the meanings of this and that. Although I had this same professor for English 101 and I didnt enjoy her 101 class I am enjoying her Film as Lit class.

PE
Basically its a self paced class where as long as you clock 30 hours and 30 visits per semester then you get an A. I am in the process of starting to go 3 times a week for an hour per session so this wont be difficult to pass.

Gourmet Cooking
This is a fun class where we meet once a week and the teacher passes out recipes and we split up into groups and make one of the recipes he passes out and then once we're all done we all sit down as a class with the dishes we've prepared and have a full blown meal. Its fun!